The table

That afternoon we gathered in front of my desk, standing up, forming a perfect circle.

There were 7 knights and I.

As soon as he started speaking to us about passion and faith, I saw their faces lighting up, their eyes filled with faith and courage. 

It takes great humanity and a burning fire inside to elevate your knights spirit, to believe in them and rise the desire for victory in your warriors.

Pygmalion

Pygmalion was a talented Greek sculptor from Cyprus. After becoming disgusted by some local prostitutes, he lost all interest in women and avoided their company completely.

Pygmalion saw women as flawed creatures and vowed never to waste any moment of his life with them. He dedicated himself to his work and soon created Galatea, a beautiful statue of a woman out of ivory.

Ironically, the masterpiece of his life was this statue of a woman. Perhaps he sought to correct in marble the flaws he saw in women of flesh and blood.

Whatever the case, Pygmalion worked so long and with such inspiration on the statue of Galatea, that it became more beautiful than any woman that had ever lived or been carved in stone.

As he finished the statue’s features he found himself applying the strokes of hammer and chisel with increasing affection. When his chisel finally stopped ringing, there stood before him a woman of such perfection that Pygmalion, who had professed his disdain of all females, fell deeply in love.

Such a passion could not go unnoticed by the goddess of love, Aphrodite. She took pity on the young man and, when Pygmalion went to her temple to sacrifice a bull, Aphrodite gave him a sign. As the offering burned on the temple, the flames shot up one, two, three times.

Pygmalion went home, wondering what to make of the manifestation he had seen. When he entered his studio, however, and saw the statue, all other thoughts were banished from his mind. He ran to his statue and embraced it.

Did she seem warm to his touch, or was it just residual heat form the sunset that had warmed the stone? He kissed her.

Did the statue’s lips seem soft? He stood back and regarded her.

Did there appear the glow of life from within the marble form? Was he imagining it?

No. Aphrodite had given life to the statue, whose name was Galatea.

Pygmalion’s mind oscillated between doubt and joy. Fearing he may be mistaken, again and again with a lover’s ardor he touches the object of his hopes.

It was indeed alive! The veins when pressed yielded to the finger and again resumed their roundness.

Slowly it dawned on Pygmalion that the animation of his sculpture was the result of his prayer to Goddess Aphrodite who knew his desire. At last, the votary of Aphrodite found words to thank the goddess. Pygmalion humbled himself at the Goddess’ feet.

The Pygmalion Effect

The Pygmalion effect, or Rosenthal effect, is the phenomenon whereby higher expectations lead to an increase in performance.

By the Pygmalion effect, people internalize their positive labels, and those with positive labels succeed accordingly. The idea behind the Pygmalion effect is that increasing the leader's expectation of the follower's performance will result in better follower performance. 

Call it the Pygmalion effect, or the anticipatory principle, or even self-fulfilling prophecies, either way, what we expect, is usually what we experience. Moreover, the way in which people view you influences how you behave. That is, the expectation of events or behaviour can actually cause them to happen! The expectation does not need to be true at the time for it to occur, but becomes true when people act on the belief. What you focus on you grow—our beliefs literally create our reality. Our beliefs are self-fulfilling prophecies. 

Pygmalion not only saw hidden potential that no-one else could see,he saw the finished sculpture in his mind long before it became a reality. Like Pygmalion, we need to see—and even seek out—the best in others, and to see their potential. Like Pygmalion, our belief in someone can bring their potential to life. As Aristotle said, “A vivid imagination compels the whole body to obey it.”

Practical ways to encourage human flourishing

Rosenthal discussed four factors that encouraged human flourishing

(1) Climate: Basically be nice to people both verbally and non-verbally and hold to positive expectations.

Being nice to people verbally might include the tone of our voice, the way we ask questions or request things to be done. Being nice to people non-verbally might include making eye contact, having an open and friendly facial expression, moving away from behind our desk or table when speaking to someone and turning our body toward them.

By viewing someone positively, we are more likely to approach them more openly. We will smile more, and be more supportive, friendly and encouraging toward them.

(2) Feedback: We give more positive reinforcement to those we expect to succeed and criticise them less when they take a misstep.

Interestingly, we provide more or less helpful feedback to people depending on whether “we think” they will succeed or fail. We subtly tear down those we think may fail. On the flip side, positive and constructive feedback helps people to grow in confidence and blossom.

(3) Input: We tend to provide more information to those we think will do well.

We set people up to fail when they come to us for feedback and we are vague about our expectations or any changes we require in outputs. To empower those we lead, it is important to clearly and graciously communicate ways they can improve their work.

(4) Opportunity: When we think well of people, we give them more opportunities to speak, more chances to respond, and we call on them more often.

When we see the best in people, we actively listen to them, give them freedom to share their opinions, and provide constructive feedback to help them find solutions. It’s a form of working together, even when in a classroom environment.

At the end of the day for better or worse, we all form expectations of people and situations. The more confidence we have in ourselves, the more likely we are to foster high expectations in those around us and motivate people toward positive outcomes.

Talk to many, think with the few

The reason I bow with respect to the idea of a round table is the essence of equality and unity in order to form the perfect shape that will change the world.

However round tables are the feature of a larger number of knights. When it comes to the core essence of growing and learning together, the smallest number is 2.

That's why I shall never buy a square table, but a rectangular one so that YOU and I shall sit side by side, on the same side.